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Follow Up on the News

The Dogs’ Day In Court
“You can’t make this stuff up,” the executive director of Ulster County SPCA and a county legislator said after alerting members of the press that there had been a major development in the tale of the 18 Olivebridge dogs. “Two of Mr. Delisio’s dogs, both puppies, were found on Acorn Hill Road near Samsonville. The puppies were brought to Olive town supervisor Bert Leifeld’s office on Friday, where he recognized them to be sick and had them sent over to the Woodstock Animal Hospital where they were found to have Giardia and Ringworm, neither of which they had when they were in our care two weeks before.”
But according to a neighbor of Delisio, Greg McKeever, ALL of the dogs in question had picked up diseases while at the ASPCA’s home in the town of Ulster. And Delisio’s attorney, Paul Shaheen, would be pulling on the other 9 Delisio neighbors who came to pick up their neighbors dogs to testify similarly when the man’s (and dogs) day in court comes up next week.
Shapiro first sent investigators out to the Mill Road home of David Delisio, 60, on April 8 based on a local call tipping him off to the inhumane conditions in which the man was keeping dogs. Eighteen dogs were then removed and brought to the UCSPCA facility in Kingston for evaluation and medical care while DeLisio was arrested and charged with 18 counts of animal cruelty.
The dogs were later returned to DeLisio following an April 15 court appearance before Olive Town Justice Ron Wright, a fellow Olivebridge resident, who based his ruling on an argument made by the plaintiff’s attorney that gives a defendant the right to regain his or her “property” until his or her case goes to trial.
DeLisio was originally scheduled to reappear before Judge Wright in Olive Town Court on May 6.
Shapiro argued in court that it was in the dogs’ best interest that they NOT be returned to Delisio.
The 18 dogs, which included adults and six puppies, were originally found locked in a tiny room within a barn next to DeLisio’s home where the floor was covered with several layers of feces, urine and trash, according to Shapiro and his investigators, along with a mattress with exposed springs. Shapiro said DeLisio was breeding the dogs as part of a for-profit venture.
“I respectfully disagree with the conclusion that the judge came to,” Shapiro said after Wright ordered the dogs returned to Delisio. “18 dogs in a 15-foot by 15-foot room is not acceptable.”
Wright was censured by the New York State Commission on Judicial Conduct in 2005 for activities related to his failure to implement speed limits in the town that he did not agree with. He was re-elected to office two years ago.
McKeever, though, said that the SPCA came by for a second “spot” inspection accompanied by Olive Town Police on the evening Tuesday, April 27.
“They complained that there was no heater for the puppies, even though it was 88 degrees out,” McKeever said.
He added that he, DeLisio and others had been requested not to talk too much about the case by Shaheen, DeLisio’s attorney, then noted that a request had been made by Shapiro to have the court date moved up to Thursday, April 29.
“Everyone’s worried that the SPCA will try to get all the dogs back. We don’t believe that’s in the animals’ best health,” McKeever said. “Yes, his place may have been messier than it could have been, what with David going to the Veteran’s hospital in Albany for tests of late. But that didn’t mean those dogs weren’t cared for. Or that he was running any sort of puppy mill there. Shapriro never said a thing about his horses, by the way.”
Shapiro, when asked about the April 27 surprise raid on Delisio and his dogs, said that he had “an inspector’s report pending” on the matter.” He added that the request to hold a hearing on the matter this week was pushed back to May 6 by the district attorney’s office.
The county legislator from Woodstock had earlier amended his press releases on the Delisio matter with a series of calls for the county to okay county funding for the SPCA he now serves as director of, and referred to the recent news regarding the two lost puppies as helping to “bolster our argument that the dogs aren’t receiving proper supervision.”
“The Animal Hospital has sent a bill for $414.30 covering medical treatment to Mr. Delisio,” he added. “The town supervisor recognized there was a problem here, and the animal hospital recognized the dogs from the news stories, which is why they called Mr. Delisio.”
Shapiro paused for dramatic effect.
“This is why we argued that the dogs should have stayed at the SPCA until the May 6 court date,” he said.
McKeever, for his part, noted that he had been told by another county legislator who requested anonymity that Shapiro had been copying all county legislators on his press releases, with added pages outlining his request for full county funding for the SPCA.
“He’s proposing to take the money towns pay individually for their own animal control officers,” he added. “I keep getting calls relating horror stories about the SPCA. People call them the ‘humaniacs.’”
Calls to Shaheen, Delisio and Wright went unanswered as of press time.
Meanwhile, in neighhboring Shandaken, townsfolk have begun to wrestle with their own dog matters of late... an expansion of existing animal control laws from two to seven pages. A first public hearing on the matter draw a large crowd on May 4.
More on the case next issue.

School Board Vote
On May 5, the board of education held a hearing on the $49.8 million budget it adopted for the 2009-2010 school year. That figure represents a 3.5 percent budget increase over current year spending, with a projected levy increase of 6.65 percent.
When the budget was adopted April 22 at a board meeting at the Phoenicia School, trustee Laurie Osmond was the only dissenting vote at Wednesday night’s April 22 meeting at Phoenicia elementary saying that although she hoped voters would support the spending plan, she didn’t feel right approving some of its cuts.
“I think the public should go out and support our budget. I think that getting the budget in, under contingency was a good thing,” she said of the fact that the budget falls below the 3.97 percent contingent budget of $50.1 million that would be implemented should it fail to pass muster with voters. “But there are elements to this that I cannot with good conscience support. You’ve all heard things I’ve said in the last several weeks and I am torn.”
Osmond, one of the three candidates on the ballot May 19, vehemently opposed the removal of the INDIE program, FACETS mental health program and one district social worker.
In a last ditch effort on April 22, Trustee Dan Spencer, also on the upcoming ballot, attempted to reinstate at least one (out of two) FACETS social workers.
But Director of Pupil Personnel Joyce Long said, “My understanding with speaking to Corey Cavallaro (president of the teacher’s union) is that if we hire an outside agency above a union member than you also have to reinstate the union member, so we couldn’t bring in FACETS without replacing a (in-house) Social Worker.”
Assistant Superintendent for Business Victoria McLaren said if the presented budget were rejected, the district would not seek a contingent budget that could raise the budget to 3.97 percent.
“No matter what, if the voters do not approve the budget, the budget will not increase,” she said.
According to law, school equipment items would have to be removed under a contingent budget. For the proposed budget, that totals $144,109.
The top two candidates elected May 19 will serve three year terms starting July 1, while the third-place winner will fill the unexpired term of Ralph Legnini, commencing the evening of the vote
and expiring on June 30, 2011.
Osmond, a Woodstock resident with a child at Phoenicia elementary, is a media production company owner who attended Brown University and graduated San Francisco State University with a Bachelor of Arts in Broadcast Communication Arts. Spencer, a Mt. Tremper resident and project manager at AMETEK Rotron, was picked to fill out Legnini’s term in February based on his appearance of neutrality. The third candidate, Mt. Tremper resident Tony Fletcher, is an author and music journalist who moved to the area so his son could attend Phoenicia Elementary.
The special propositions are for bonding to purchase one 65 seater school bus and two smaller buses for the district, and to shift up to $350,000 from a capital fund balance to cover final costs on the auditorium, whose bids came in higher than originally budgeted.
In other recent business, it was announced that the district’s Communications Committee is putting together next year’s school calendar and are asking for the public to submit photographs of local interest. The Chair of the committee, Abbe Aronson said that the theme is, “Many towns, one district.” They are asking for Jpeg photographs and/or email compositions to be submitted to the website no later than May 26. A link can be found on the district website (Onteora.k12.ny.us). She added that if people do not have access to a computer they could send in written submissions or photographs to their local school’s PTA.

Wreaking Rural Havoc

After weeks of fending questions on both sides of the aisle about the uproar these bills have drawn from a public that has widely perceived them as a foundational battle in an oncoming food crisis which could shadow today’s banking horrors, the bills’ sponsors have called out the troops to dampen the glowing cinders.
One document that has appeared on a number of websites supporting HR 875, which has drawn most of the attention among the bills thusfar, aims to stop a “misinformation campaign” and “outrageous myths” against the bill using slickly deceptive means to that end. It chooses six points from an abundance of criticism directed at the bill to dispute as “myths” and dismisses the far from frivolous concerns being widely expressed by small farmers, gardeners, local marketers and consumers around the country.
The posting boasts that the commonly trusted Organic Consumers Association has asserted the selected myths were without substance, falsely implying that OCA supports the bill and says the same for the Canadian-based North American Organic Trade Association, a group which has been accused of being a big business front designed to discredit the organic foods movement. Disturbingly, its short list of “major consumer and food safety groups” supporting the bill is fleshed out with the kind of industry-supported “false green” organizations termed “astroturf” outfits by John Stauber and Sheldon Rampton in the “Poisoning the Grassroots” chapter of their popular 1995 book Toxic Sludge Is Good For You!: Lies, Damn Lies & the Public Relations Industry. On the surface the entries appear respectable but most would not know, for example, that the Pew Charitable Trusts, which they list as a supporter, has been deeply involved in the promotion of genetically engineered foods (gmos) and even hired Monsanto attorney Michael Taylor to aid the “cause.” Food poisoning victim groups are an obvious cherry for a dubious grouping in the eyes of 875’s critics.
No one is disputing an obvious need for “safe food” and a dependable system for distributing it, but opinions swiftly diverge when you start to read below the headlines. Small farmers and local growers point to the toxically corporate value system of factory farms as the overwhelming source of food-borne illness and protest that applying industrial-sized provisions to smaller operations presents the kind of business-crippling burdens that only agricultural behemoths could applaud. Synthetic pesticides, herbicides, antibiotics, organophosphates and other chemicals applied in industrial farming; CAFOs (Concentrated Animal Feeding Operations) and hellishly close confinements of livestock are at the root of the problems, they say, not small producers.
One of the “myths” attacked in the posting is that the bill was “written by Monsanto and other large agribusiness companies” but, instead of identifying its unknown authors, the release points to several congressmen with progressive records on farm issues who support the bill. An unconfirmed report that a former vice president of the massive Cargill corporation was its primary author is left unaddressed. Monsanto, whose record of aggressive litigation against small farmers and frequently decried efforts to gain control of the world’s food supply has done little for its reputation, also denies any direct involvement with the bill. Characterizations of the company’s legal division as a pack of mad, snarling dogs is clearly unfair to a calculating and highly organized team of wolverines but, if they choose to be honest about it, they could hardly deny that the fallout from HR 875, enacted as is, would be far more beneficial to the big guys than the rest of us.
As far back as 1999, Monsanto was linked to proposed legislation to police rural communities and intimidate seed-savers, imposing complex state-level regulations on growers and seed cleaners. A recently installed federal-to-state-to-local communications network under the Homeland Security system could simplify surveillance of rural agricultural activity beyond the limitations of cutback FDA staffing and coverage. In HR 875, food is divided from drugs under the FDA umbrella of the Department of Health & Human Services and grouped with the Department of Commerce’s National Marine Fisheries Service into the newly created Food Safety Administration (FSA). There are few complaints about dividing the food and drug sections of the FDA, certainly as compared with grievances against their methods of operation. Under the FSA, a “food czar” would be appointed and is designated in the bill as “the Administrator” who would exercise an expanded federal power over food production and commerce, embracing aspects of authority usually reserved to different branches of government, legislative, judicial and executive, similar to the Administrative Procedures Act. Unannounced spot inspections are mandated and the czar, under Section 103 of the bill, can be selected from corporate officials, industry lobbyists or other food “expects.” Speculation has it that Michael Taylor will be a natural consideration...
Another “myth” is addressed in the release by accurately stating that “(t)here is no language in the bill that would regulate, penalize, or shut down backyard gardens.” Correct. There is no explicit language to that effect but neither is there any language which specifically exempts such gardens from the provisions of the bill and that’s what all the commotion is about. As pointed out in the Appomattox Area News,, a “food production facility” in the bill “means any farm, ranch, orchard, vineyard, aquaculture facility...confined animal-feeding operation (or) small commercial farmer who eats his own food.”
Although the bill defines its terms repeatedly, it is rarely in an unambiguous fashion. A “Food Establishment,” for instance, means any slaughterhouse (except those regulated under the Federal Meat Inspection Act or Poultry Products Inspection Act), factory, warehouse or facility owned or operated by a person located in any State that processes food or a facility that holds, stores or transports food or food ingredients.” Food establishments are further broken down into categories which seem to embrace “anyone not currently subject to inspection” including anyone who “processes”... “fresh produce in ready-to-eat raw form.” Excluded from mandatory registration are restaurants and other retail or nonprofit food establishments where food is served directly to the consumer. The word “commercial” in the definitions of “process” or “processing” presumably spares others who prepare or package food in a not-for-profit manner but not with the certainty critics desire.
Violations can incur civil penalties of up to a million dollars per day for each violation with criminal sanctions resulting from food-caused illness or injury of up to five years and, as the Farm To Consumer Legal Defense Fund stresses there is “every incentive for FSA to levy fines” because they can then use the funds to carry out enforcement activities- including the provision of assistance to States for inspection and enforcement, thus giving States a reason to support the bill.
A reference in Section 210 to the “National Animal Identification System as authorized by the Animal Health Protection Act of 2002” raises the question, since this Act is not currently law, of when this bill was written. NAIS was still being discussed in the legislature in March. One of the “myths” is “debunked” in the press release with the observation that NAIS, which calls for implants in domestic animals, is under the jurisdiction of the USDA rather than FDA and, so, not relevant to 875 but Deborah Stockton, executive director of the National Independent Consumers and Farmers Association believes that if any of the current bills pass “it would ratify NAIS, and strengthen USDA’s ability to make it mandatory for all livestock, including your flock of backyard chickens.”
Another troublesome section sets standards for minimums and types of fertilizer use, raising fears that certain chemical fertilizers will be required that would conflict with organic practices which don’t meet the industry standard.
Record-keeping requirements are a large concern, especially given that the word “modernization” in the bill’s title suggests electronic trace-back systems like those mandated in the even more worrisome FDA Globalization Act of 2009, HR 759. As the Maine Organic Farmers and Gardeners Association points out “the Food and Drug Administration has shown a marked inability to find solutions that work for small farmers without expensive and product-changing technology.”
There are many other troubling details of this bill and the others which are further examined in the full version of this article (which is available on our website) but the national fuss raised since the first part of this article was published has not gone unnoticed and now signs of retreat among the lawmakers have become evident. Jeff Lieberson, a spokesman for Congressman Maurice Hinchey, a co-sponsor whose website features the “Myth” vs. “Fact” release quoted here, has stated that the bill’s original sponsor Congresswoman Rosa DeLauro (D-CT) and Hinchey have a good relationship and “we’ve had extensive conversations with Ms. DeLauro’s office. We’ve also received assurances from her office that, if there were any legitimate concerns that came forward, they’ll adjust and amend the bill. We feel confident that there’s no problems with it but if there are some that come up, we’re confident she’ll adjust them. The Congressman would not support a bill that would be detrimental to local small farmers.”
“The focus of this legislation...is to improve the system so that the product that Americans put on their plates is safe for them to consume,” Lieberson continued. “Our office is actually taking a closer look at the organic system and regulations to try to see if we can straighten things.”
As further evidence of an impact from the hullabaloo, Rep. DeLauro’s office has indicated that there have been recent meetings with organic farmers in an effort to acquire suggestions for amending and improving the bill. Some quite succinct suggestions were offered last month by syndicated food columnist Ari LeVaux: “So lawmakers, if you’re listening and you want these protestors, ballistic and level-headed alike, to chill out, here is how to get them off your backs: exempt local food systems from the current bills. Include specific language ..that will guarantee that small family farms, backyard gardens, personal livestock, farmers markets and all forms of food self-sufficiency and farmer-direct purchasing are protected. Because the right to buy milk from your neighbor or grow your own food is as inalienable as the right to bear arms. And if you threaten to take away this right, you’re going to face a backlash that will make the NRA seem like a bunch of flower-waving Hare Krishnas.”


The Esopus Is Dying

After years of worries about the effects of climate change and development on stream temperatures, it turns out that an invasive algae has accomplished what generations have been fighting to keep from happening.
No matter which term one uses for it – the scientific Didymosphenia geminata, common usage didymo or much more prosaic “rock snot,” the invasive species of streambed algae that U.S. Senator Chuck Schumer came to Boiceville to loudly request federal funding to fight earlier this month is now actually IN the same Esopus Creek waterway he was standing by on April 8.
As well as in the East and West branches of the nearby Upper Delaware river, two other renowned destinations for trout fishermen around the globe.
That new invasion raises a number of key questions, now, about how to contain it and keep the Didymo from spreading out of its current locations in the major stem of the creek and into its tributaries and, just as importantly, prevent its movement to other waterways within the region.
There are currently no known ways of clearing streams of the algae, which has closed down whole sections of trout fishing areas in Arkansas, Tennessee and New Zealand to date.
Didymo harms trout habitat by competing for existing fish feed along a stream’s bottom, as well as by making it difficult to find footing for fishermen and women among its slippery weeds.
In fact, streams where it first appeared in New Zealand are now basically dead to all living organisms, according to reports.
Meanwhile, the timing of the New York State Department of Environmental Conservation press release announcing its findings on April 27, has led at least one local river watcher – who actually began posting his own streamwatch signs warning of invasive algae before the April 1 start of trout season a month back – to question who knew what when. And ask why, if there were even suspicions of rock snot in the Esopus, the DEC went ahead with its annual trout stocking activities along the stream a couple of weeks back.
“DEC collected samples and confirmed the presence of didymo in the vicinity of several public access sites along a 12-mile stretch of the Esopus from the ‘Shandaken Portal,’ which transfers water to the Esopus from Schoharie Reservoir, to New York City’s Ashokan Reservoir,” the DEC release read.
Previously, the algae had been confirmed near the Vermont border, as well as in the East and West branches of the Delaware River.
Rock snot, as those who know Didymo best like to call it, grows on the bottom of both flowing and still waters and is characterized by the development of thick, gooey mat-like growths which can last for months even in fast flowing streams. Didymo mats look like brown or white fiberglass insulation or tissue paper and although appearing to be slimy and stringy, actually feels rough and fibrous to the touch, similar to wet wool. It does not fall apart when handled.
In addition to making footing difficult, the DEC has pointed out that rock snot can impede fishing by limiting the abundance of bottom dwelling organisms that trout and other species of fish feed on. They add that there are “currently no known methods for controlling or eradicating didymo once it infests a water body.”
The purpose of their recent press releases has been to promote a new, statewide policy of “Check, Clean and Dry” for all who enter and leave the Esopus, as well as other waterways within the state. Since the microscopic algae can cling, unseen, and “remain viable” for several weeks even in seemingly dry conditions, they are particularly instructive when it comes to cleaning all one has worn while in a waterway.
For non-absorbent items, the DEC suggests washing with dishwashing detergent, bleach, hot water and/or salt. Longer soaking times of at least half an hour in very hot water and detergents are suggested for absorbent materials, as well as considerable drying times, Last but not least, they suggest not using anything one’s worn into the Esopus or its tributaries into other waterways.
“We have been in contact with the Ulster County Executive, Senator Schumer’s office, USGS, DEC and DEP on this issue. At this point there is nothing we can do on this stretch of the Esopus,” noted Ashokan Pepacton Watershed Chapter of Trout Unlimited President Chet Karwatowski of the situation this week. “We must do our best to inform the public and try to prevent the spread of Didymo further upstream of the portal, into the tribs and other river systems that people frequent when they leave the Esopus (Neversink, Roundout, Deleware, Schoharie, Beaverkill Willowemoc, etc.) We must get the word out to tubers, kayakers and other recreational users of the Esopus who may unknowingly transport Didymo elsewhere. The same goes for highway crews, or anyone working in the waters of the Esopus.9”
As for that prescient streamwatcher, Jim Littlefoot, he notes a series of thwarted attempts to get both the state DEC and TU to do something about the stream throughout recent months, and eventually putting up his own signs along the banks of the Esopus in March, before the April 1 opening of trout season.
He pointed out that per his announcements, everyone was aware of the dangers by April 2, a full week before Schumer’s press op below the Five Arches Bridge in Boiceville. Furthermore, he felt news of the algae’s presence in nearby waters should have been more widespread prior to the opening of trout season
And stocking, he added, still went ahead as usual on April 15.
“Could this have been prevented a year and a half ago, when I first started alerting people? Probably not,,” Littlefoot said. “But the whole area would have knowledge of Didymo and fisherman and others could have been informed how to prevent it. Now it is all catch up.”
“It feels like there’s been some collusion here,” said Littlefoot, who promised letters to local papers and more signs. “I would have just shut down the entire stream. I know other states are doing that.”
He pointed out websites for the Tennessee Wildlife Resources Agency and New Zealand’s environmental agency. Both showed, graphically, why the innocuously-named Didymosphenia geminata and more seriously monikered didymo is now known as “rock snot.”
“The threat of Rock Snot has been around for the last few years. Major manufacturers of fishing equipment have already redesigned their products to help prevent the spread of these types of invasives, said Karwatowski in answer to Littlefoot’s charges. “There is also a Catskill Regional Invasive Species Partenship (http://www.catskillcenter.org/programs/land/crisp.html). The question of who knew what, on what date, is a red herring; the issue is now that we have Rock Snot in the Esopus, what should we be doing about it and how do we prevent the continued spread of it.”
Littlefoot added that he has been recently meeting with Ulster County officials about utilizing county prisoners to help put up more warning signs along creek banks where the algae already exists, and begun placing signs along the Rondout and other fabled trout streams in the area.
He added that he has also met with Town Tinker’s Harry Jameson, who is very concerned and said he’d work with the Catskill Mountain Railroad to place more signs around.
“This is likely to change the way we fish our streams,” said Bill Rudge, Natural Resources Supervisor for the NYS Department of Environmental Conservation, during a recent presentation on the scourge.



 

A Jar Of Olives...
On A More Serious Note - How About Rooting For The Underdog?

How I wish I could sing! The Olsen family was genetically devoid of the music gene. Where there should have been some inkling of harmony, we would sound like a duet of trumpeting elephants and honking geese. We could even butcher “Happy Birthday” with giggles and self-appraising disdain for the chorus of cacophony. I can’t carry a tune, but I can recognize those who have been blessed with that talent. We all know that Dorraine Schofield has that heavenly gift, but did you know that there are many others amongst us who can sing as Susan Boyle can sing. One of those gifted singers is Carol Merante who sits behind me in church. She sits to my left, and behind me to my right is Mark Lindemann who can really belt out a tune. I sometimes feel like I am having a private stereo concert that belongs in the Pepsi Arena. Ed Baldyga will perform The National Anthem at American Legion and town functions, but he has a voice that could air at the Super Bowl football opening. Jenny Parks Haaland’s rendition of “Memories” from the musical Cats rivals any I have heard since. Our local firefighter Steve Fuller can really set a stage on fire with his Broadway style of singing. I can
remember being amazed when he sang in Jesus Christ-Super Star.
I bet there are many others who are unassumingly talented out there in Olive. Maybe we need to add a talent component to Olive Day called “Olive has Talent.” I, a self-confessed raspy singer and clumsy dancer, would have to relegate myself to either judge or audience since I would not subject friends and neighbors to a painful song and dance.
The Court of Honor of Troop 63 inducted three young men as Eagle Scouts. In order to obtain the Boy Scouts’ highest honor, scouts must undertake a community project. Ace DeSiena created a memorial garden behind Phoenicia Elementary School in honor of a classmate who died. Matt Xavier created a nature walk behind his place of worship. The bridges he built over a swampy area enable worshipers to access a pond to reflect and meditate. Will Melvin resurrected and improved the Nature Trail behind Bennett Elementary School. The wide variety of trees were identified and labeled, and an outdoor classroom was constructed. Will’s father, a teacher at Onteora Middle School, will be using that open-air venue for a field trip this Thursday in a “Go Green” opportunity to celebrate Earth Day through nature study.
At the Court of Honor ceremony I learned a little about the history of Eagle Scouts. The first eagle scouts, twenty-two of them, were honored almost a century ago in the year 1912. Out of a total of twenty-two in the whole United States, five Eagle Scouts were from West Shokan, New York. The five Eagle Scouts from Troop #63 in West Shokan were: Sidney K. Clapp, Scout Master, Jacob S. Langthorn, Jr., Robert T. Pleasants, Bertram Van Vliet, and Leon Van Vliet. Olive sure does herself proud with her citizens’ accomplishments.
Speaking of pride. The Olive Fire Department held its annual banquet last Saturday. It is the tradition to hand out service awards, and one remarkable one for sixty years of service was awarded to John Adsit. Jack Molloy wasn’t far behind with the fifty-five year pin. Chief John “Pup” Wullum said they don’t even make service pins for that long, so a statue of a fireman and a plaque were given to commemorate the dedicated service. The agitator of the year award, a real agitator from a washing machine, was give to Ralph VanKleeck, Jr. No explanation was given, but they said Ralphie was “very deserving.”
As you are reading this, I am probably returning from a cruise to the Caribbean. I am hoping that Pirates of the Caribbean aren’t real like they are in Somalia. I took that ride at Disney World, but I do not want a reality show of it.